Blog: Mel's Muse - Related to Family & Parenting
Teen Drug Abuse: Peer Education Training Challenges Misconceptions
Posted: Tuesday, 30th March 2010
INTRODUCTION TO GUEST BLOG BY LUCY CRIPPS
My novel, A Painful Post Mortem, has been
selling now for sometime, and has raised a substantial sum of money
for the two charities I chose to support with the proceeds. This
month, in addition to the print edition, I decided to make it
available as an e-book. Cutting out shipping by making it
downloadable helps not only the economy, but also goes some way to
addressing green issues.
Articles on related themes:
Family & Parenting; Self Help; Assertiveness; Personal Growth
Godparents - What Should They Do? Anna Ford And Martin Amis At Loggerheads
Posted: Friday, 26th February 2010
Godparents - what are they and what is expected from them? In times of falling church numbers, it may seem almost anachronistic to be asking. However, it appears to be a hot topic!
ANNA FORD ON MARTIN AMIS’ ROLE AS GODFATHER
I arrived home from holiday today and, within ten minutes of stepping through the front door, received a phone call from the producers of the BBC Radio 4 programme ‘PM’.
Articles on related themes: Speaking Engagements; Radio / TV; Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Family & Parenting: Tough Love & Discipline Prove Best Practice
Posted: Monday, 23rd November 2009
Bereavement comes in various guises, chief of which is the grief and loss caused by death. But losing a child to drugs has its own grieving process. And it was in recognition of this that I wrote my bereavement poem, Weep For A While.
In my article last week, titled,
British Law Undermines Parental Authority I reproduced part of
an interview I did at the end of my book, A Painful Post
Mortem, which looks, among other things, at parental
bereavement and ways of coping with the loss of a child.
Articles on related themes:
Family & Parenting
Demise Of A Marriage: A True Story - Part 2:2 Lost & Found
Posted: Thursday, 19th November 2009
Arguing a case against Jesus’ claims about eternal life, Megan is brought face to face with the truth that it is her pride which prevents fulfilment of her inner yearning. A second visit to a Billy Graham rally sees her accepting that even a good friend is no substitute for faith. Only a life saving treatment will suffice. But what will it do for the gulf in her marriage.?
Catch up with the story so far in Part 1:1 The Inner Yearning. It will be posted, in parts, two or three times a week.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Family & Parenting; Marriage; Relationships; Inspirational
Family & Parenting: How To Love Yourself - And Difficult Elderly Parents
Posted: Tuesday, 17th November 2009
Dear Mel,
My parents have always had a very explosive relationship. There were always shouting matches when I was a child, and I grew up fearful that they were going to get divorced. My dad had a very fiery temper, whereas my mum would be tearful. Inbetween the rows my dad was always very loving to mum.
MANIPULATIVE BEHAVIOUR
Later, when I was a teenager, she changed. Instead of being
tearful she had a different tactic. Whenever they had a row
she’d go off for the day and then my dad would be beside
himself worrying about her. When she got back, she’d behave
as if nothing had happened.
Articles on related themes:
Family & Parenting; Assertiveness; Relationships
Demise Of A Marriage: A True Story - Part 2:1 Lost & Found
Posted: Thursday, 12th November 2009
With marriage, babies and moving house having failed to still the inner yearning in Megan’s life, she feels sure that her new friendship with Eileen must be the answer. Especially when Eileen invites her to hear Billy Graham. Eileen has a faith in God which Megan finds enviable. Eileen knows Jesus as her Saviour and Lord. Can Eileen change Megan’s life for the better?
Catch up with the story so far in
Part 1:1 The Inner Yearning. It will be posted, in
parts, two or three times a week. For a free prompt to
follow the story to its conclusion click the Subscribe button on
the right.
Articles on related themes:
Books, Reading & Words; Family & Parenting; Marriage; Inspirational
British Law Undermines Parental Authority: Novel Shows How
Posted: Tuesday, 10th November 2009
I wrote, last week, about the sad story of Kate Walsh who, at the tender age of sixteen, became a heroin addict and died, alone in a dirty squat. Her parents had asked, repeatedly, for help from various authorities and received none. They had, as the Coroner described it at Kate’s Inquest, fallen into a ‘grey area’.
Since it highlights that grey area, I thought it might be
helpful, this week, to reproduce part of the interview at the end
of my book, A Painful Post Mortem.
Articles on related themes:
Books, Reading & Words; Family & Parenting; Current Affairs
Demise Of A Marriage: A True Story - Part 1:3 The Inner Yearning
Posted: Monday, 9th November 2009
With two babies only a year apart in age, Meg is as lonely as ever. Will moving house be the answer? For a while it seems a possibility. But as James’ career ambitions take him away from home once more, it seems that only a new friendship might fill that inner yearning.
Catch up with this true story so far in
Part 1:1 The Inner Yearning. It will be posted, in parts, two
or three times a week. You may wish to subscribe (for a
free prompt) to follow the story to its conclusion. Simply click on
the button on the right.
Articles on related themes:
Relationships; Marriage; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Inspirational
Mel Menzies On BBC Radio WM: Should Cannabis Be Downgraded Per David Nutt's Advice?
Posted: Friday, 6th November 2009
The resignation of David Nutt, the UK government's drugs adviser, sparked controversy over the classification and downgrading of cannabis. Mel Menzies comments on BBC Radio WM on Sunday 8th November at 08.50, in the light of her daughter's teenage drug abuse, and ultimate death.
Read the story here: Addicts Like Kate Walsh Show That The Grey Areas Of British Law Need A Black & White Reform.
And make sure to tune in at 08.50 on Sunday 8th November!
Articles on related themes: Speaking Engagements; Family & Parenting; Current Affairs
Heroin Addicts Like Kate Walsh Show That The Grey Areas Of British Law Need A Black & White Reform
Posted: Wednesday, 4th November 2009
We read, this week, of a situation which has complied with British law but which is, nevertheless, a grave miscarriage of justice. Kate Walsh’s parents, when their sixteen year old daughter died of heroin in a dirty squat, were denied the protection that the law is supposed to provide. They are not alone. British law in the area of adolescents is a mess.
“I have lost faith in the police, in doctors, in the Government; they have shown a shocking level of incompetence,” Kate’s father, Anthony Walsh, is reported as saying.
A "GREY AREA" IN BRITISH LAW
He’s right! And the sad thing about it is that there’s nothing new in this.
Articles on related themes: Bereavement; Family & Parenting; Current Affairs; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Demise Of A Marriage: A True Story - Part 1:2 The Inner Yearning
Posted: Wednesday, 4th November 2009
Less than a year into Megan’s marriage to James, with her baby born and motherhood now a reality, the cracks which were apparent from the outset, are beginning to widen. As the swinging sixties begin to make themselves felt, the over-riding question is: can Megan find, in James, the love she craves?
Catch up with the story so far in Part 1:1 The Inner Yearning. It will be posted, in parts, two or three times a week. You may wish to subscribe (for a free prompt) to follow the story to its conclusion. Simply click the button on the right.
MOTHERHOOD
James laid his newspaper down.
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Marriage; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Inspirational
Demise Of A Marriage: A True Story - Part 1:1 The Inner Yearning
Posted: Monday, 2nd November 2009
What follows is a true story, the real life story of a woman named Megan, who was raised in an era when to be married, to be a wife, was the pinnacle of aspiration for a woman. The expectation that you shopped, cooked, cleaned and raised children whilst your husband worked, played and waited to be waited on was rife. But, on the cusp of the hedonistic sixties, the expectation often failed to deliver.
It will be posted, in parts, two or three times a week.
You may wish to subscribe (for a free prompt) to follow the story
to its conclusion.
Articles on related themes:
Marriage; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Relationships; Inspirational
Successful Step-parenting: If Ozzy Osbourne Can Do It, So Can You!
Posted: Thursday, 8th October 2009
I was asked by BBC Radio Birmingham to be their 'expert' on this morning's discussion on step-parenting. I’ve forgotten how many times I’ve been interviewed in connection with my book, Stepfamilies, but I suppose, given that something like one in eight British children are now growing up in a blended family, it’s a hot topic.
STEP-CHILDREN: SOMETIMES THEY GET ON, SOMETIMES THEY DON’T
Ozzy Osborne kicked off the discussion in the studio, by admitting that his children from his first marriage and those from his second (to Sharon) "sometimes get on, and sometimes don't".
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Family & Parenting; Speaking Engagements; Stepfamilies
Anti-Social Behaviour: Is It The Result Of Legislation Promoting Children's Rights?
Posted: Wednesday, 30th September 2009
Newspaper reports on the life and death of Fiona Pilkington and her disabled daughter make harrowing reading. Victims of abuse and anti-social behaviour by local youths, the lives of both were made a misery for years. However, despite making no fewer than thirty-three complaints to the police, her plight, and that of her daughter, was ignored. Until, unable to endure the situation any longer, she ended their misery in the only way she knew how: by taking her daughter to a remote place, and setting fire to the car.
I could weep for them both.
TACKLING ANTI-SOCIAL BEHAVIOUR? HOW?
Three points particularly interested me about the story.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Successful Step Parenting: Three Potential Pitfalls - No 2 Coping With Step Children
Posted: Friday, 21st August 2009
Only a day after doing the BBC Newcastle Breakfast Show, I had a phone call from BBC Birmingham, asking me to kick off the debate on Sunday morning 9.05 a.m. on – guess what – stepfamilies! What’s going on here?
In my blog of a couple of days ago, I identified the three potential pitfalls in a stepfamily as:
- Relationship between the couple
- Relationship between stepparent and stepchild
- Relationship between an absent parent and child
They all seem pretty obvious, don’t they? And without doubt, they overlap and interlink.
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Family & Parenting; Speaking Engagements; Stepfamilies
Successful Step Parenting: Three Potential Pitfalls - No. 1 Financial
Posted: Tuesday, 18th August 2009
BBC Radio Newcastle, which serves an area from the Scottish Borders to Durham, asked me to speak, this morning, on whether stepfamilies could ever be as successful and harmonious as biological families.
As before, on my interview with BBC Radio 5 Live, I answered a resounding Yes. From personal experience, plus observation of the families I interviewed for my book Stepfamilies, I know that step parenting, while never easy, can be worked at, and blended family challenges are rarely insurmountable.
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Family & Parenting; Speaking Engagements; Stepfamilies
What Is The Role Of Godparents: Are They Really Relevant Today?
Posted: Friday, 14th August 2009
The Richard Bacon Show on BBC 5 Live airs a debate between midnight and one in the morning. The topic, last night, was Godparents. I was asked to be one of the panellists, to explain the role, and to argue the case that Godparents were still relevant in this day and age.
To be honest, I’m not entirely sure that they are!
THE HISTORICAL CONTEXT
It was easy enough to do a little research on the subject via the excellent Church of England website, and I was able to tell the radio audience the bare bones of the history and role of Godparents.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Speaking Engagements; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
What Is The Role Of Godparents: Are They Really Relevant Today?
Posted: Friday, 14th August 2009
UPDATED 27th FEBRUARY 2010
It seems strange, in this highly secularised world, that the concept of Godparents appears to be such a hot topic. It makes you wonder if, despite our anti-religious dogma, we’re not – deep down – actually spiritual beings after all.
Well, of course, I’m in no doubt that we are! But the article that follows – first written in August, 2009 - suggests that there does seem to be some strong feeling, plus a good deal of confusion.
Articles on related themes: Speaking Engagements; Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Do False Expectations Of Marriage Cause Stepfamily Problems?
Posted: Wednesday, 8th July 2009
What follows is an excerpt from the soon to be published revised and updated edition of Mel's book, Stepfamilies.
It is a false premise to expect that any marriage can ever answer all of our needs. To think otherwise is a totally unrealistic ideal which is doomed to disappointment. And this, perhaps, is one of the prime reasons for the failure of so many marriages.
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Stepfamilies
Marriage And Remarriage: When Two Halves Don't Make A Whole
Posted: Friday, 22nd May 2009
Following is an abridged and revised excerpt from Mel’s book Stepfamilies, which the BBC recently asked her to debate on the Richard Bacon show. In previous posts, the inference has been that unless the two people embarking on a second (or subsequent) marriage get it right, there is little chance of tackling other blended family issues, such as step-parenting.
Most marriages don’t add two people together. They
subtract one from the other.
Articles on related themes:
Relationships; Self Help; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Stepfamilies
Live With Less: How To Love Working To Live Rather Than Living To Work
Posted: Monday, 18th May 2009
I began this article a couple of months ago before Parliamentary Expenses took over as the latest UK soap opera escapism from the real story of boom and bust economics. So I wondered, this morning, whether it would still have any relevance; whether, in fact, it would resonate with you, my readers. But thinking about it, I see now that it is all part and parcel of the same malaise: an obsession with economic prosperity which completely masks the real values in life.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Love And Commitment: The Basis Of A Stable Marriage
Posted: Friday, 15th May 2009
Last week, in my Friday series on Families & Parenting, which is currently focused on stepfamilies, I pointed out that if American author Charles Swindoll equated marriage to a house, then remarriage could be said to be like a conversion. I then went on to show why love, in terms of romance, is not always enough to get you through the grey days, and suggested that commitment – an act of will rather than emotion – was the answer.
Today, I’m going to continue with an outline of what traditional marriage and commitment have to offer.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Relationships
Stable Stepfamilies: Book Excerpt - Foreword
Posted: Friday, 1st May 2009
AS A SCHOOLGIRL, I loved history. Not the dry dates and wars of my school books, but the vital characters that strode right out of their pages straight into my imagination. People like Henry VIII of England, for instance. His marriages particularly fascinated me.
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Stepfamilies
Bereavement Rituals And The Effects Of Grief
Posted: Wednesday, 29th April 2009
Dear Mel,
Last week it was exactly a year since my Penny passed away. We’d only been married ten years – no children – and she meant the world to me. I never thought I’d get through this last twelve months but I have and I wanted to mark the occasion, but at the same time I was dreading it. I talked to my Minister, and he did a thanksgiving service for her. It was mainly family and close friends, but I was very touched that some people from church came, even though it was mid-week.
I nearly lost it when we went to the cemetery afterwards to lay flowers.
Articles on related themes: Bereavement; Family & Parenting
There Is Nothing Loving In Living A Lie: Telling Children The Truth About Divorce
Posted: Sunday, 19th April 2009
Dear Mel,
My husband and I are getting divorced. There’s no one else on either side. We just shouldn’t ever have got married in the first place. And I don’t think we would have been married as long as we have except that I’ve put up with everything that wrong without saying anything about it.
The thing is, our teenage children are beginning to blame me – even though they’ve seen some of the things that have gone wrong in the past and seen how their dad was at fault.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Forgiveness; Relationships
Sex Education And Teenage Pregnancy
Posted: Sunday, 15th February 2009
“Do cats get married, Daddy?”
The question came from my four-year old granddaughter. She’s one of twins, and is obsessed by cats.
“Nope,” Daddy replied.
“Then how do they have babies?” asked Millie.
With the news of a thirteen year-old fathering a child fresh in his mind, and wanting to foster a sense of relationship, my son-in-law quickly revised his denial.
“Well - perhaps cats do get married after all.”
SEX EDUCATION REVIEW
It’s a tricky topic. Not how cats make babies, but how children shouldn’t. Much is made, nowadays, of educating the young.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Current Affairs; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Building Sustainable Relationships For Stepfamilies
Posted: Saturday, 24th January 2009
I hope you’ll forgive me! I’m afraid I’m going to take the easy way out today and simply upload part of a chapter from my Stepfamilies book, on the topic of building effective relationships with somebody else’s children. It’s been a difficult week; as I tweeted only today: my mother has fallen and broken her pelvis. To make it worse, she’s on holiday in Spain. Worse still, she is my dad’s Carer: he has dementia. (This is beginning to sound like the plot for a novel!) Lots of obstacles to be overcome.
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Self Help; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Stepfamilies
Overcoming Shame: Are We Guilty Of A Guilty Conscience?
Posted: Tuesday, 6th January 2009
I was reading about a man – Jeff Lucas – who described himself, in his younger years, as a “shame addict”. The term resonated with me and sparked a sitting-up in bed, early morning debate – though, sadly, without a cuppa to accompany it.
“That describes me years ago,” I said.
“Yes!” my husband agreed. “But what did you feel ashamed about?”
“Everything,” I replied.
It made me think.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Current Affairs; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
January Blues
Posted: Saturday, 3rd January 2009
I don’t know about you, but for the last couple of days I’ve been feeling vaguely depressed. Some of my feelings of malaise are undoubtedly to do with tiredness brought on by having a houseful of guests to feed, and the late nights spent sitting on hard, upright chairs, playing games like Mexican Train Double Dominoes around the kitchen table. The game, purchased for us by a chum visiting America, has been a huge success with friends and family.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
A Black Hole Where Once Your Mind Was
Posted: Saturday, 27th December 2008
His world is one of darkness. Silent. Confused. He’s not entirely Anything. Not blind, nor daft. Just less of what he was. Diminished. Shrunken. Glimpses of shapes he catches in the side of his eye appear tall and distorted, disorienting and delusional from a moving car. The rushing sensation induces motion sickness. He cries out for it to stop.
Sometimes, in the house in which they’re staying, he thinks he sees faces he knows. His eyes dart about to confirm an identity, but the features he thought recognisable dissolve into a black hole of oblivion.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
14 Ways To Avoid Stress - And The Breakdown of A Relationship At Christmas
Posted: Friday, 12th December 2008
ORIGINALLY WRITTEN PRE-CHRISTMAS 2008, THE FOLLOWING POINTS MAY BE ADAPTED, AND ARE VALID AT ANY TIME OF THE YEAR
The effects on children when parents are separating are immense. They are quick to pick up on the cracks and strains that appear between warring parents, and it is the adults’ responsibility to protect them, as far as possible, from the consequences of relationship breakdown. Whatever the state of affairs between you and your spouse, you need to practice self-discipline in front of your children. Which, when you’re facing the possibility of coping with marriage breakdown, is not that easy.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Personal Growth; Relationships
How To Recognise The Signs Of Relationship Breakdown
Posted: Thursday, 11th December 2008
Boy, did my last post on Children In Divorce & Separation provoke a response! Not in comments, because it’s a painful subject; but in more hits on my website than ever before. There's obviously a lot of hurt out there, especially at this time of year.
That article dealt with the effects of family breakdown on children – in other words, after the event. So I’m going to follow up with a couple of ‘before the event’ articles, on ways to avoid stress. Hopefully, a few simple strategies should tide you over the holiday period until you can seek outside help.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Self Help; Relationships
Children In Divorce And Separation: A Christmas Tragedy
Posted: Tuesday, 9th December 2008
Christmas – traditionally the time of good cheer – is also, for many, a time of great sadness. Somehow, the fact that everyone is out to enjoy themselves seems to concentrate the mind when it comes to the tragedies of life. A train derailment or plane crash in the weeks leading up to the festive season appear all the more terrible precisely because it’s Christmas time. People talk about it for years to come.
WHAT HAPPENS TO CHILDREN WHEN PARENTS SEPARATE?
For many years that’s how it was for my family. Because Christmas day was remembered as the day my husband walked out on us all.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Family & Parenting; Relationships
Step Parenting Advice: Don't Do It Unless You're Prepared To Work At It!
Posted: Thursday, 4th December 2008
Can A Step Parent Ever Replace A Real Parent? This was the topic under debate on the Richard Bacon radio show on BBC Radio 5 Live on Tuesday evening. As the author of a book titled Stepfamilies, I had been invited to participate to put the positive side of the case, whilst Philip Parkin, General Secretary of the Teachers Union Voice, was to argue against. In the event, we both (I think) found ourselves singing from the same hymn sheet.
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Self Help; Family & Parenting; Stepfamilies
Debate on BBC Radio 5 Live
Posted: Tuesday, 2nd December 2008
I’ve been asked to take part in the Richard Bacon programme on BBC Radio 5 Live on Tuesday 2nd December from midnight until 1 a.m. The debate is: "Can step parents replace real parents?" Because I’ve written a book titled Stepfamilies, I’ve been asked to take the ‘yes’ side. Listen in if you want to put a voice to the name and face. And take a look at the first of a series of posts on the subject of Successful Step Parenting
Articles on related themes: Relationships; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words; Speaking Engagements; Stepfamilies
Successful Step Parenting: Do You Know What It Takes?
Posted: Wednesday, 26th November 2008
I’ve been asked by BBC Radio 5 Live if I would take part in a debate, arguing the case for the premiss Can A Step Parent Take The Place Of A Real Parent? The e-mail was from one of their producers, who said he’d found my book, Stepfamilies on a Google search. During the telephone conversation that ensued, he asked me if I knew of anyone who might argue the case against. I’ve had to say that I don’t.
STEPFAMILY PROBLEMS
My book was based on personal experience, but also included a number of case studies: people my second husband and I interviewed for the book.
Articles on related themes: Forgiveness; Self Help; Family & Parenting; Bereavement; Stepfamilies
Youngest Child In The Family: Paragon? Or Pain?
Posted: Friday, 14th November 2008
Where, in birth order, do you come among your siblings? Are you the youngest child in the family? Do you see yourself as different to your brothers and sisters? Are you aware of a gulf between them and you?
Having previously written about eldest child syndrome and middle child complex, today I’m going to begin a study on the concept of the youngest child in the family.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff; Self Help
Grandparents Caring For Grandchildren
Posted: Friday, 31st October 2008
Eighty per-cent of children in the UK are regularly cared for by a grandparent, says The Times, with the result that sixty per-cent of all British childcare is undertaken by grandparents. As payment for grandparents is virtually non-existent (92% receive no remuneration) this is at a saving to the economy of £4 billion a year.
PAYMENT FOR GRANDPARENTS
Many grandparents caring for grandchildren say that they would find the offer of money an affront. But I suspect that this sensitivity would be greatly diminished if the care they gave were to be officially recognised.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting
You Wouldn't Do It To A Dog
Posted: Wednesday, 29th October 2008
A cracked rib is painful at the best of times. A fortnight with an undiagnosed cracked rib still worse. But a fortnight, yelling in pain, being fobbed off with paracetamol and accused of malingering, when you’re 94 years of age is outrageous.
THE WRONG SORT OF BLINDNESS
It began two weeks ago last Sunday. My other half and I went to my parents’ home to spend the day with my father so that my mother might have a day of respite playing in a bridge tournament. My father is the ninety-four year old; my mother – his carer – is ninety.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Best Evening Gowns For A Fashion Fix?
Posted: Saturday, 25th October 2008
The Party Season Beginneth. And if you’re after a Fashion Fix, you need look no further than Marks & Spencer. Have you seen the glamorous evening gowns on offer through their Autograph range? One of the most stunning, in my view, was advertised recently in The Daily Telegraph.
GLAMOROUS EVENING GOWNS BEAT RECESSION
In these days of gloom and doom, the sight of luxurious, feminine fabrics and décolletage are enough to thrill any woman’s heart.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting
Birth Order - Middle Child
Posted: Friday, 17th October 2008
According to the Wikipedia website, one of the first people to suggest that birth order has an effect on personality was an Austrian psychiatrist, Alfred Adler. A contemporary of Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung, he argued that the way in which each of us tackles the major aspects of life – friendship, love and work – is greatly influenced by our birth order in the family.
Articles on related themes: Life, Faith & Other Stuff; Family & Parenting; Books, Reading & Words
Eldest Child Syndrome - Are You One? Or Do You Know Of One?
Posted: Thursday, 9th October 2008
Have you ever been in a situation where you begin to wonder whether other people’s expectations of you exceed your ability or willingness to deliver? Of course you have! Silly question – unless you’re one of those super-humans who knows how to say ‘No!’ But that’s another issue, for another day.
BIRTH ORDER AND SELF
Thing is, there’s a limit to what you can do, isn’t there? I’m one of the sandwich generation – more of that, too, on another day – so I have both young grandchildren for whom I care twice a week whilst my daughter teaches, and parents with various health issues, who require a degree of support.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting
Man Flu? The Female Version's The Killer Strain!
Posted: Monday, 6th October 2008
MAN FLU?
I don’t know about Man Flu, but I’ve definitely been suffering with the female version this week. You know the sort of thing? Having hardly slept overnight, you wake up on Monday morning feeling utterly ghastly: stuffed ears feeling as though they’ve been pumped full of the insulating foam that lines the cavity walls of your house (unless you happen to have shares in British gas); throat behaving as though you’ve swallowed a golf ball, if not a tennis ball; head exploding; and nose like a blocked drain in need of a plumber and a plunger.
THE FEMALE VERSION’S WORSE
But hey! You’re female.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting; Life, Faith & Other Stuff
Divorce & Family Law - Does It Affect Us All?
Posted: Wednesday, 17th September 2008
Other Posts on Books & Reading: The Isolation of Being Unable to Read
STATISTICS OF SINGLE PARENTS
What do you think of when you read of mothers raising children without fathers? Does it incite you to indignation? Rage? And if so, against whom? The mothers who so ruthlessly exploit the benefits system with serial offspring by multiple fathers? The feckless fathers who abandon them? Or the systematic onslaught of successive governments who have dismantled the best-known building block for the stability of society: marriage and the family unit?
Whilst we are (rightly) concerned with such matters, we appear to have allowed the other end of the spectrum to have slipped from our sight.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Current Affairs; Family & Parenting
The Isolation of Being Unable to Read
Posted: Monday, 8th September 2008
Related topics: 59 Million Keywords to PublicationReading Between The Lines
EFFECTS OF ILLITERACY
Have you ever thought what it would be like if you were unable to read or understand a word of this blog? Doubtless you would be feeling the same shame and isolation as the people I wrote about in my post: Reading Between the Lines last month. Tears were aplenty as they shared their stories in the TV series Can’t Read; Can’t Write – and they weren’t solely those of the participants! There we learned that in Britain, alone, over five million adults have a reading age of 12 or less, or are unable to read at all.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Current Affairs; Family & Parenting
Child Pornography
Posted: Tuesday, 2nd September 2008
CHILD PORNOGRAPHY – A SUBJECT FOR DRAMA?
Child pornography may not be everyone’s ideal Sunday evening viewing (UK - BBC1 – Fiona’s Story), but it is, sadly, a topical subject. The problem, to my mind, is the way it was dramatised. Am I the only one to feel that it was all very unsatisfactory? Both content and conclusion left me feeling badly let down.
I can understand that if you’ve been married for some years and love your husband, then – like Fiona – you going to be in denial to begin with. Shock and disbelief go hand in hand.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting
Does my bum look big in this? (Or that wretched F-word again)
Posted: Monday, 4th August 2008
A fortnight ago I wrote that legislation against the use of certain words (like Chav) is ludicrous and went on to quote from Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet: What's in a name? that which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. “It’s not the word that’s at fault,” I said. “What’s needed is a change of attitude. And that, sadly, can’t be dealt with by the law.”
I read this to my husband, and he totally disagreed with me!
“Look at the way attitudes have changed towards homosexuality because of changes in the law,” he said.
CAN THE LAW GAG DISSENTERS?
Yes, he has a point.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Current Affairs; Family & Parenting
Drugs & Human Rights - the god of the era
Posted: Friday, 1st August 2008
Click for related post: Parent Power = Kids' Confidence
I wonder how this generation of policy-makers will go down in history? Human Rights, it seems, is the god of the era. It certainly takes precedence over any sort of morality. And common sense? Well that’s out of the window.
I refer to the statistics showing that Britain now has an estimated 1% of the population taking illegal drugs, and somewhere in the region of 300,000 children growing up in homes where one or both parents is an addict, in a trade estimated to be worth more than £5.3billion.
Articles on related themes: Books, Reading & Words; Current Affairs; Family & Parenting
Parent Power = Kids' Confidence
Posted: Sunday, 6th July 2008
It was the doll’s clothes that reminded me. My daughter had decided that, at nearly four years of age, the twins were old enough to play with some of her most precious toys. So they’d arrived at my house armed with a doll’s buggy each, Katy, Lillibet, and the latter’s entire wardrobe. My heart did a little skip of pleasure. I recognised the tiny Liberty-print dresses, with their puffed sleeves and patch pockets, the lace-trimmed matching knickers, coats and headscarves, from long ago. I had made them for Lillibet decades earlier, from scraps of materials left after dressmaking for my daughters and myself.
Articles on related themes: Family & Parenting
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