Spoof Poetry: Or Gripes From The Chancel

Posted at 05:10am on 20th March 2010

No time for a blog today because we're about to go away for the weekend. So I thought I'd put up this poem for your enjoyment. It was sent to me some years ago.

IMMORAL, IMPOSSIBLE, GOD ONLY KNOWS

(Tune: St. Denio)

1. Immoral, impossible, God only knows
how tenors and basses, sopranos, altos
at service on Sunday are rarely the same
as those who on Thursday to choir practice came.

2. Unready, unable to sight-read the notes,
nor counting, nor blending, they tighten their throats.
the descant so piercing is soaring above,
the melody only a mother could love.

3. They have a director, but no-one knows why,
no-one in the choir deigns to turn him an eye.
It's clear by his waving, he wants them to look,
but each of them stands with his nose in the book.

4. Despite the offences, the music rings out.
The folks in the pews are enraptured, no doubt.
Their faces are blissful, their thoughts are so deep,
but it is no wonder, for they are asleep.

Notes:

  • Original, verse 1, by Austin Lovelace.
  • Verses 2-4 added by Ron Hodges (choir of St. Mark’s, Palo Alto, California, USA) for the church’s 50th anniversary in November 1998.

Your Comments:

Post a comment:

No HTML allowed. Web URLs will be auto-linked. Please stand by your comments; anonymous posting is permitted but not encouraged. Your email address will not be published, nor will it be distributed. Comments are moderated, and will not appear on this weblog until the editor has approved them. They may also be removed without notice or explanation.

Related Posts

Posts on related themes:
» Occasional Silliness
» Poetry

My Latest Book

Time To Shine

Available in paperback from my books page, Amazon and Foyles
Buy Your Copy

Find the Real You...

Start Now
Take a FREE
Personality Test

An Interview with Tom Wright

I had the pleasure of interviewing Tom Wright at the CRT Retreat. Have a listen!

Recently On Twitter

My interview on Premier Radio, in which I shared my writing journey and my latest book, Time to Shine, was immensely…https://t.co/ma3MLIk9vR
tweeted by MelMenzies
on 15th December at 16:49
All who joy would win must share it. Happiness was born a Twin... - Quote - http://t.co/chI74jHMnt
tweeted by MelMenzies
on 15th December at 16:35
@MelMenzies Groan!!
tweeted by Cymraes44
on 15th December at 02:03
Follow Me on Twitter

Who's online?